All posts by TheBelleofA.

About TheBelleofA.

"Sometimes, the most happiest people have sacrificed a lot and cried a lot. Sometimes, the people who smile, hide their pain." "The worst part about being strong is no one ever asks if you're okay." "I want people to see the vulnerable side of me." I'm just a teenage, complex, stubborn and crazy, Christian girl, who hopes her writing helps people and who tries to help people as much as possible. I hope to be a doctor and writer, soon. I may be a suicidal, hippie or hipster girl, yes. But I am also, a daughter of God and a child of light. And so are you; a child of light and daughter and/or son of God. I need Jesus. Even though, I can be messed-up, confused and lost ... He somehow, still loves me. I need Him; everyday, every hour, every minute and every second. I need him, so much. He loves you and me. We both matter,because we do. We are loved. I am in love with Jesus; I love with Him. As I live, I will live for Jesus Christ; and when I die, I will die for Jesus Christ. I will stand in His love for all of us; for each and everyone of us. I'm just a teenage girl, who's growing and who can't help but care. I can't help but care, because I care. "I'm just trying to live, I'm not trying to survive." "I am still learning." -Michelange (age 87) "As I stare into God's eyes, His eyes start to become mine." "I know the world is afraid and hurting, but if you peel the skin of this world, you'll find His Kingdom." "A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek HIM to find HER."

A New World Stepped Into

 

My room is the pale pink, round moon in the south corner where I read,

And the light that I read from are the fireflies that fly there

And that cast a rose-coloured glow against my burned skin

And the straw blanket bleached by the sun that covers my bare shoulders.

 

I dip my feet in the night waters filled with light,

And the suns and stars float like daisies and sunflowers in the universes

As I watch them, laying upside-down, go with the tide,

And the light that falls on me makes what was weak, strong and beautiful now.

 

There is a hint of surprise and deep royalty and a scarlet of fall that I see

And flowers that I thought fell from the sky and grew in the morning,

And winding, delicate ivy buds in my air that blend with the moonlight

And sunlight that I drown in.

 

Give me the stars and suns and moons to separate the darkness in me

And let me step into the sky warm with the sunrise and sunset

And lay on the trees that stretch their arms, soaked with the sun’s setting colors,

And I will learn how to love myself and let my broken heart heal.

You Make Me Beautiful

 

Even through my tears,

When you kiss my tears away,

And you call out my name

In the storm of this desert,

You make me feel beautiful

And make me want to believe that I am

Even with the scars and bruises I have,

As you open my eyes more from this darkness

And gently hold my hand;

Covering my weaknesses

With your strengths –

And how I see the sun through the storm,

And dance with you and for you

In the sunlight that wraps around me

As the rain gently comes down

To these forests of sands

And washes them away

Along with the stains on my soul –

And here I am to say that you are my Jesus;

Here I am to say I am yours alone

For all I need is you,

And I will run with you

With nothing wrong with me –

Joyful.

The Stars Become Flowers

 

The stars in my hands are pale, and delicate, but strong flowers
slowly blooming right there, right now as if time
was no burden to them at all, or time could not stop them;
and they are shining so bright
as if laughter had kissed them on their lips
and now they cannot stop smiling
as the sunlight shines on their day,
drenching in the sunlight,
becoming little suns,
as they sing a song in the night in the universe that they live in
to let someone know,
and red giants sitting on horizontal branches wave at them,
that they can lean on someone’s shoulder
to rest and sigh slowly,
to breathe in and to breathe out rest and quietness,
like the way that a river does
that becomes into an ocean
with its waves;
knowing that they need to be still
and rest into something far bigger than themselves.

What Once Was

 

Ashes to the ground then to the sky
While this fire it burns,
And the wild cry of Camelot rises
From the ruins of what once was
England’s glory and pride
Because peace and wisdom were sought after
And fought for,
A King wanting that for his people.

But Lady Peace and Lady Wisdom,
War is in this country of yours.
Blood is the color of your skies, Camelot,
As tempers are lost and no one seems
To seek for you, Lady Wisdom;
And your quiet strength, Lady Peace,
Are not in many of the hearts of men,
But instead mayhem – the Devil’s tool and foothold.

Lives are lost and sacrificed, and the living
Forget how to breathe
As they focus that the ones they love
Are dead and not coming back,
And not on what their loved ones gave to them
When they were with them.
So sacrifices made for them and the love
That was given are forgotten as if it were nothing.

O Camelot, O Camelot,
Why did you do that?
Why did you not trust your King?
Why did you take the lies for truth, and truth for lies?
Why did you lose what you should have
Held onto, and yourself?
Trust the hope that was waiting for you in this darkness?
That God would take you by the hand to lead you?

Will you do it again, though, like you once did before?
Will you believe with me, borrow what is mine and what I have
To help you in these journeys that we both have?
Will you slip your hand into His hand, Someone oh so beyond all this
That we know and everything else?
Borrow my smile, my laughter, my hope, my faith, and my peace?
Just take it, my love; I want to give you these flowers
That you’ve seen and grown to know that I love.

You’ve pushed Lady Wisdom aside during this time,
Getting caught by all that is happening –
Will you listen to her now, though, to her sharing her heart?
That this suffering we see is not for nothing,
Unless we make into nothing, though?
Because if you make the suffering and sacrifices that have happened
Into nothing, just like that,
Then it will be nothing to you when all along
It was something real in this world we live in to hold onto.

4/9/16

 

Love borne silently in the heart is hard to bear,

I miss you and think of you,

everyday it seems.

My heart is bare, you can see myself in my eyes.

I know now what the whispers of being sick

and weak with love now mean

because that is how I am now,

but not many see that –

I may be the only who can see that,

despite my eyes may be closed.

 

But love is a burden I am willing to carry –

my hands to be bound with love,

to love others, not just you, I am willing.

Ropes of kindness and love, I’ll be lead by.

I will plow the hard ground of my heart,

the stubborn stone that can be in my heart,

to plant seeds of righteousness

to harvest the crop of love,

along with the flowers that grow;

patience, and kindness, and joy in the truth,

perseverance, faith, and hope – in time, –

having fully again, a tender heart that responds

and a new spirit in me.

 

A/N: Hosea 10:12 (NLT), Hosea 11:4 (NLT), Ezekiel 36:26 (NLT), and 1 Corinthians 12:4-8 (NLT and KJV). These were verses in the Bible that I read over and over again, helping me write this poem. This is just something that has been on my heart for a long time.

 

 

 

 

4/6/16

Here’s a happy birthday to the girl who has made it this far and who has even further to make than this.

Happy birthday, love.

 

 

A/N: I felt the need to say this and happy birthday to myself, haha. I made it this far only because of God, and I have further to make because of God. I look forward to the further that God will take me to. He is God, my faithful God. 🙂