Tag Archives: God

A New World Stepped Into

 

My room is the pale pink, round moon in the south corner where I read,

And the light that I read from are the fireflies that fly there

And that cast a rose-coloured glow against my burned skin

And the straw blanket bleached by the sun that covers my bare shoulders.

 

I dip my feet in the night waters filled with light,

And the suns and stars float like daisies and sunflowers in the universes

As I watch them, laying upside-down, go with the tide,

And the light that falls on me makes what was weak, strong and beautiful now.

 

There is a hint of surprise and deep royalty and a scarlet of fall that I see

And flowers that I thought fell from the sky and grew in the morning,

And winding, delicate ivy buds in my air that blend with the moonlight

And sunlight that I drown in.

 

Give me the stars and suns and moons to separate the darkness in me

And let me step into the sky warm with the sunrise and sunset

And lay on the trees that stretch their arms, soaked with the sun’s setting colors,

And I will learn how to love myself and let my broken heart heal.

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The Stars Become Flowers

 

The stars in my hands are pale, and delicate, but strong flowers
slowly blooming right there, right now as if time
was no burden to them at all, or time could not stop them;
and they are shining so bright
as if laughter had kissed them on their lips
and now they cannot stop smiling
as the sunlight shines on their day,
drenching in the sunlight,
becoming little suns,
as they sing a song in the night in the universe that they live in
to let someone know,
and red giants sitting on horizontal branches wave at them,
that they can lean on someone’s shoulder
to rest and sigh slowly,
to breathe in and to breathe out rest and quietness,
like the way that a river does
that becomes into an ocean
with its waves;
knowing that they need to be still
and rest into something far bigger than themselves.

What Once Was

 

Ashes to the ground then to the sky
While this fire it burns,
And the wild cry of Camelot rises
From the ruins of what once was
England’s glory and pride
Because peace and wisdom were sought after
And fought for,
A King wanting that for his people.

But Lady Peace and Lady Wisdom,
War is in this country of yours.
Blood is the color of your skies, Camelot,
As tempers are lost and no one seems
To seek for you, Lady Wisdom;
And your quiet strength, Lady Peace,
Are not in many of the hearts of men,
But instead mayhem – the Devil’s tool and foothold.

Lives are lost and sacrificed, and the living
Forget how to breathe
As they focus that the ones they love
Are dead and not coming back,
And not on what their loved ones gave to them
When they were with them.
So sacrifices made for them and the love
That was given are forgotten as if it were nothing.

O Camelot, O Camelot,
Why did you do that?
Why did you not trust your King?
Why did you take the lies for truth, and truth for lies?
Why did you lose what you should have
Held onto, and yourself?
Trust the hope that was waiting for you in this darkness?
That God would take you by the hand to lead you?

Will you do it again, though, like you once did before?
Will you believe with me, borrow what is mine and what I have
To help you in these journeys that we both have?
Will you slip your hand into His hand, Someone oh so beyond all this
That we know and everything else?
Borrow my smile, my laughter, my hope, my faith, and my peace?
Just take it, my love; I want to give you these flowers
That you’ve seen and grown to know that I love.

You’ve pushed Lady Wisdom aside during this time,
Getting caught by all that is happening –
Will you listen to her now, though, to her sharing her heart?
That this suffering we see is not for nothing,
Unless we make into nothing, though?
Because if you make the suffering and sacrifices that have happened
Into nothing, just like that,
Then it will be nothing to you when all along
It was something real in this world we live in to hold onto.

4/6/16

Here’s a happy birthday to the girl who has made it this far and who has even further to make than this.

Happy birthday, love.

 

 

A/N: I felt the need to say this and happy birthday to myself, haha. I made it this far only because of God, and I have further to make because of God. I look forward to the further that God will take me to. He is God, my faithful God. 🙂

{August 12, 2015 on a Evening}

{August 12, 2015}

Jesus stood right in front of me, and I put my hand into his hand; and then he led me to different places.

I saw blurred trees and pine trees and dark green grass and a garden with greens and colors as he led me and I followed; and then he led me to a cliff that was triangular and that had rocks on it that I stood on as we stopped, and I stood on the edge of the cliff and looked out.

And what I looked out to was a sea and grass moving together. A sea that was grey but with a little bit of blue in it and the grass a soft, dark green grass that moved as one; and I stood on top of rocks as I stood on the cliff with the rocks surrounding me as the wind blew while the sea and grass moved.

The skies in the distance dark grey and light grey, yet here was light around me. Around us.

And as soon as I was led there and I stood there, he started talking to me.

“What is life, my little one? Life is me. I am Life.

With the suffering but victory. With the sadness but joy. With the seeming chaos but clarity. With the weariness but rest. With the weakness but strength.

I am Life, my little one. I am The Way, The Truth, and The Life.

I am your life.”

And he showed me another vision that I had had the other day as he talked to me and gave me the answer that I needed, reminding me of that other vision.

The vision was me being led by a hooded person to a dim room with little light; and the room had a chair in the middle of the room.

I was being given a test, and I knew that I was as I sat on the chair; and when I sat on the chair, the person who was hooded gave me a knife and said, “You know what you have to do with the knife.”

And the person left, and I was alone; and as I was alone I thought to myself, “I can kill myself. I have a choice now. I’m free to kill myself now. There’s no one here to stop me.”

Yet as I said that to myself, something wasn’t right. Deep down inside me, I knew that something wasn’t right. There was something wrong; and though I had the urge to kill myself since I could in that vision, I didn’t.

I asked God as I was in pain, “What is life, God? Tell me what is life, please; because I don’t know what life is, and I’m stuck. I want life, but I don’t know what life is. Tell me what life is, please.”

And then I was back, still on the cliff; and I knew what Jesus said to me was true. That He is Life. That He is my Life.

I opened my arms as the wind blew towards me, blowing on my face as I closed my eyes and as Jesus was there with me; everywhere with me.

Just there with me, and that was what I needed: for him to be there with me.

I opened my arms, and he hugged me. Jesus hugged me and told me what I needed to hear that day on Wednesday evening.

“No more fantasies about death. No more dreams about death.”

And he kept on hugging me as we both stood on the edge of the cliff.

And ever since that evening that I had that beautiful, beautiful adventure with him, my Jesus – I have not had a fantasy or dream about death because I can’t.

I can’t because he said no more fantasies and no more dreams about death.

For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever. 

2 Corinthians 4:17

{Hope Willn’t Die}

{August 13 and 14, 2015}

Yellow stars
fall to the ground,
but they crumble
and the stars
turn brown
and they shrivel;

dying
without their skies,
dying because
they’re on the ground.

Yet stars
stare at me
when I look up;
and when I
look down,
the stars
still shine.

Hope has not died,
even if
my heart is broken
and hurting.

The stars
I love too dearly?
They will die,
but hope
will not die –
not this strong
and trustworthy hope.

Just like the stars,
hope will always shine
in the dark
or light.

My hope will not die,
and lies before me;
though I sometimes
may not
and do not
see it before me –

it lies before me;
strong and trustworthy,
and there.
This hope will not die.

I have
a future and a hope.

~~~

My hope will not die because God is whom I put my hope in, and he is my hope.

{The Crows’ Cry; August 7, 2015}

I know now why the crows cry.
They sometimes do mock us,
and always seeming to want
to mock us and trick us
as they fly above us
and stare at us with
their heads cocked to the side.

But haven’t you heard them,
heard them cry hoarsely
as their tears and mine
scratch us both with marks.
This sadness too much
to bear for me and them;
that is why we both cry.

They hear me cry like an animal
and I hear them cry
to each other and to the world,
and they’re crying and asking,
“When? When?”
“When will this sadness end?”
Both of our hearts hurting, God.

How do we not notice
the sadness in their eyes
as they stand and stare at us.
See past the mockery
and trickery that they do,
and you’ll find sadness
that hurts and that I have.

“When? When?”
the crows
sadly cry
and ask me.